A single statement that serves to "manage change" as my primary thesis in my mission statement might be phrased along these lines:
A new business venture should be established that centralizes various communication services in a single location for small, home-based and mobile businesses, and that possesses potential for future expansion into multiple markets as a franchisable enterprise.
Problems a reader might have with this statement most likely rest in its presumption of a need for this type of business. That presumption will be met in the form of a business plan.
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A good draft, Markel, but as you noted there are some things you can do to improve it. Get rid of the "should" and "possesses potential." For me these are not deliberate enough words for a mission statement. No one should be skeptical of your purpose after reading your mission statement. You might also consider listing some sort of benefit statement to give an idea of the scope of the service: "...communication services in a single location for small, home-based and mobile businesses to what end?" What service are you really providing the customer. I mean what is the outcome for a customer who purchases your service beyond the centralization.
ReplyDeleteExcellent suggestions.
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